Re: [MLUG - DISCUSSION] April 1 jokes (was: network problem)

[Jonathan King <EMAIL:PROTECTED>]

On Fri, 1 Feb 2002, Mikhail Kovalenko wrote:

> Mike Miller wrote:
> >
> > On Fri, 1 Feb 2002, Ross, Matt wrote:
> >
> > > "You're going to pass this class"
> >
> > They'll know it's a joke right away!
> >
> > Mike
>
> That's an awesome one. >8)
> Thanks! Do you know any more?

Actually, Mike's point is that an April Fool's joke is one that is
(at least) initially believable, and you can get people to play
along.  The problem with "You're going to pass this class" is that
nobody is going to believe it for a minute.

How about:

"After seeing your pathetic performance on the last test, I realized that
very few of you had really mastered the concepts in the prerequisite
courses after all.  As it turns out, there's a way to correct this in the
grading system.  I was surprised to find out last night that an instructor
in a course with set prerequisites can re-assign grades for the
pre-requisite courses if he or she finds out that the students actually
know the prerequisite material better or worse than their grade would
suggest.  So, <bright student's name>, you actually now have an "A" in
<prereq course here>.  Good job!  Some of the rest of you weren't nearly
so lucky, and now have "D"s in <prereq course here>.  Unfortunately, once
those grade adjustments were made very early this morning, the computer
system discovered that <number here> of you no longer had the <grade here>
needed in <course here> to take this class, so it automatically dropped
those students from the class.  The registrar thinks she can get refunds
for most of you minus, of course, the late drop fee that must be paid
since you are withdrawing late in the term.  She graciously allowed me to
let you continue auditing the course, for what good that will do you.

"Now, <high number> of you actually took and failed <prereq course> three
semesters ago and should have therefore been on academic probation two
semesters ago, where your continued poor grades would have forced you to
withdraw last semester.  The registrar informs me that those of you who
were living on campus will now have to be out of the dorms by tomorrow
morning, since the provost has just made a deal with the State Department
to house some of the slightly less dangerous Taliban and Al Qaeda
prisoners of war from Camp X-Ray given the shortage of space down there in
Cuba.  Well, that's the plan; Amnesty International just filed suit down
in DC to block this because of the cruelty provision in the Geneva
Convention.  If that actually works, then the POWs will go to the Boone
County jail while some excess non-violent offenders will take the rooms
here.

"So would the following students please collect your things and come to
the front of the lecture hall? The campus police will escort you back to
your dorm rooms to pack."

<Instructor then reads off the roll of all students in order, by which
time they SHOULD realize it's a joke.>

Well, I think that would be hysterically funny.  Students at MU seem to be
very uptight, though, so I'm not sure I'd be willing to try this one again
on campus.

jking









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